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My brain is in a mess.

Archive for July 2008


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I’m a hopeless romantic. Those of you who know me well, should know this.

I love falling in love, being in love, staying in love… all that. 

My favourite songs include See a better day by Graham Coxon and Toothpaste Kisses by The Maccabees. My favourite movie is The Notebook. I read chic lit half the time, because I like seeing the heroine of the book (usually a clumsy normal girl) find the love of her life.

See, everything points to my hopeless romantic nature. When was the last time you saw me truly happy, like glowing? I was probably in love, or having a major crush on someone (who I was hoping to fall in love with). 

I need this. More then you guys know. The last time it ended, a major reason was because we thought it wouldn’t last forever, that was me mostly. I told him that I didn’t think I would end up marrying him – because I thought he was an aimless boy who would never grow up to be the man that I wanted to marry (you know all that jazz about husband material and all). That totally crushed him and eventually we gave up on each other.

Sometimes you just got to let your heart do the feeling and then let your head do the thinking, not the other way round. We’ve decided to give it another chance. Not to commit till we think we can make it last, but not to rule it out completely either. We care a lot about each other, too much to go down the same old road and hurt each other.

Falling in love is easy, staying in love is the difficult part. That kind of love is more like caring a lot for the other person. I said that some time ago, when he said that to me today, I was kind of speechless. 

We both spoke to people about this, and different people said different things. I think what’s most important is that we are happy. So please support me on this, if this ends in us being unhappy along the way, at least we can say that we tried, because I think the last time we were young and too restless for our own good.

I’m not saying that this will last forever, I just need some sort of hope that there’s a chance of us being happy… like truly happy.


Written by priya.balraju

July 30, 2008 at 1:45 am

Posted in Love

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What a feeling

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“You are beautiful, but you are empty. One could not die for you. To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you–the rose that belongs to me. But in herself alone she is more important than all the hundreds of you other roses: because it is she that I have watered.”  

– Antoine de Saint-Exupery

I’m feeling super duper lazy, and I have work later. Someone commented that I seem to be working all the time. Like since I was 16. And it’s true. Its not that I love to work, I just hate being bored at home. Why stay home and be broke, when you could be out earning some money? No matter how little the amount is, it’s still better then nothing, no? Well, at least that’s how I was brought up.

Oh, and Ade has posted all the pics of the photo series that we did at Arab Street (: Its all SO PRETTY. 


Written by priya.balraju

July 26, 2008 at 1:57 pm

Posted in Friends

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Don’t cry

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sometimes people forget that others have emotions. sometimes i forget that i have emotions. we live life so quickly, everything is instant these days, we forget feelings. i can go for months without feeling any strong emotions about anything. no bliss, no anger, no loss… just staying content, being a little jaded. it’s become normal, but what if i want to feel? i want to feel passionate about someone, to have butterflies, to feel loved, to look at that person as though i’ll never love anyone else the same way and feel overwhelming emotions for a person that brings tears to my dry eyes. i want to fall in love again.

i think i need a pet. i’m too cynical for this shit.

A lack of colour – dcfc

Written by priya.balraju

July 23, 2008 at 1:15 am

Posted in Love, Rant

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Worth holding on to

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I always love photo spreads with a theme. Alice in wonderland, strippers, lovers.. just a good theme in general, with pretty people of course. Here are ten of my favs,

Stepford Mum

Lab Assistant

Playgirl Bunny

French Maid

Little Red Riding Hood

Dominatrix & slave

Mother Mary (Mother Jesus, lol.)

Rockstar (with Irina, I <3)


& Cat Lady.

I’ve always loved a good story.

Oh and another thing, I have the bestest, glammest friends on the planet… but of course you already knew that. (:

Written by priya.balraju

July 22, 2008 at 1:42 am

Posted in Fashion, Friends

Tagged with ,

I can touch my toes

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In the study of awkward poses, Charbs & Co, are loyal students. 

And of course my favourite.. 

So when I stumbled upon this poster of poses,

I decided that we need to take some neeeeeeew pictures. Guys, we have a new project (:

Oh and here’s the video I was talking about. I have a bad case of diarrhea.

I also like this one, its amazing how jolly they look teaching others what to do in a case of a robbery.


Written by priya.balraju

July 19, 2008 at 1:09 pm

Posted in Friends

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Come over

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The art of losing isn’t hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn’t hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother’s watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn’t hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn’t a disaster.

–Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan’t have lied. It’s evident
the art of losing’s not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster. 

“One Art” by Elizabeth Bishop

Written by priya.balraju

July 18, 2008 at 12:53 pm

Posted in Fashion, Poetry

Tagged with

This gift

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In class today, my lecturer was talking about how there is a correlation between the amount of alcohol people drink and the kind of music that a bar plays (I know, riveting right?) So on the bus ride home I got to thinking about my favorite songs and how they make me feel. Certain songs really do mean the world to me, so, I made a little list.

Best song to ____ to:

Cry: Hallelujah by Jeff Buckley

Smile: Toothpaste Kisses by The Maccabees 

Dance: Please don’t stop the music (Jody Den Broeder Radio Edit) by Rihanna // Let me think about it (Club Mix) by Ida Corr

Strip: Discoteka by Starkillers

Make out: Brighter then sunshine by Aqualung

Do the horizontal tango: Britney’s Blackout Album

Breakup: You could be happy by Snow Patrol // Tiny Vessels by Deathcab

Get married: See a better day by Graham Coxon // Your song by Ewan McGregor (Moulin Rouge OST)

Die: Candleburn by Dishwalla

Miss someone: Run // Set the fire to the third bar by Snow Patrol

Wake up: My same by Adele

Fall asleep: Again by Lenny Kravitz // Maybe Tomorrow by Stereophonics

Dream: I want to hold your hand by The Beatles

Feel like a kid: We go together by the people from the Grease Soundtrack

Of course, this is a very very personalized list (:

And I also have a new music discovery to RAVE about!

Little Boots

I’m hooked. She’s amazing. Formerly the lead singer of the band Dead Disco (I loved them too) she is now on her own making club ready music that I’m so in love with. So far, I’ve heard the songs that she’s posted on Myspace and a tonne of remixes from all over the place, mainly BigStereo, and I must say that I really want her to release an album so I can have it!

Automatic by Dead Disco

She also does this thing where she makes videos of herself playing live in her bedroom, I find that endearing. You can find them all here.

More of her prettiness:

A gig that she did, I love the little machines she uses to make her music.

And her latest single. Meddle.

There’s also an AWESOME remix by Toddla T. If you pass by it, download!

Written by priya.balraju

July 16, 2008 at 3:30 am

Posted in Fashion, Music

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