hello stranger.

My brain is in a mess.

a little treat

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My Macbaby crashed on me last week, turns out the hard disk is gone 😦 sent it to the hospital already, still going to take like 4-5 more days before it’s ready. I feel so naked without a laptop to come home to. So, the holiday season is upon us, not that I celebrate x’mas or anything, its just days for me to relax and catch up with people I love.

Anyway, over this holiday season I hope you have as much sex, joy and love that you can possibly handle without feeling like killing those around you (:

Here’s 2 articles to help with that, they’re cute.

Pretend your tongue is the bad cop and the clit is the guy who killed your partner. Separate him from his buddies (the lips) and suck him right up into your mouth. Now he’s on your turf. Keep him erect by creating an airtight vacuum chamber in your mouth. Slap the little bugger upside the head with one big tongue bonk. He’s not going to tell you shit because he’s a clit and he has no idea what you’re talking about, but kick his ass anyway. After a few teasers and swirling circles, rat-a-tat-tat him senseless like a boxer whacking a speed bag.

The vice guide to eating pussy

Your hand should form a tube like a skirt around your mouth, with your thumb and forefinger like a belt that meets your lips. Keep it well lubricated and don’t stay static. Your other fingers can fan and fold and tickle and tug as your mouth and tongue circle and bob up and down the top part. Most of the feeling is in the head of the penis so don’t waste too much time on the shaft. You’re looking for a tempo akin to “Pop Goes the Weasel” played at half speed. Never lose the rhythm or the concentration of your mouth up and down around the tip of the penis.

The vice guide to giving head

Cheers to great oral sex all year round people (:

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Written by priya.balraju

December 20, 2008 at 3:09 pm

Posted in Random

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